The Dungeonmaster
(a.k.a. Ragewar)
(1984)
Director: Various
Cast: Jeffrey Byron, Richard Moll, Leslie Wing
A long time
ago when I was a teenager, I used to dream of making it big in
Hollywood. And when I talk about Hollywood, I of course mean the part
of Hollywood that has to do with the motion picture industry. I used to
dream of being some major and well publicized player in the film
industry, like a movie director or an actor. But I eventually realized
that not only would such positions endanger my privacy, they would
require a lot of hard work. So my Hollywood dreams eventually drifted
to ones where I would be connected to the industry, but in a more
private behind-the-scenes position, like a best boy or a set
construction worker. If I was given the chance today to work in such
positions, I would be seriously tempted. But I would only take on the
job if I would be working with other people doing more or less the same
job. This would ensure that what I would be doing would be correct. To
tell the truth, if I were a big shot on a Hollywood movie such as a
director or a producer, I would want many of the lowly positions in a
film crew to be held by more that one person, so that I would be
assured that nothing would go wrong. Though at the same time, I would
be careful that there weren't too many people doing the same job.
Producer Samuel Z. Arkoff once recalled that when he visited the set of
the notorious movie Cleopatra
when he was in Italy on other film business, he noticed crew members
wearing badges reading stuff like, "Grip # 24" or "Electrician #36".
"Why the hell would any picture need thirty-six electricians?" he
wondered.
Obviously from this story, studios need to keep a close
eye on film crews to make sure there isn't any waste there on a film
project. For that matter, studios should also take a look at the
creative angle of a film project to make sure there isn't any waste.
I'm talking about positions such as screenwriter or director. Now,
there are times where both positions can use the work of more than one
person. I remember a couple of times collaborating on script projects
with other people. Both scripts never got finished, but I remember
discussing with the other people various ideas for the scripts. Some of
my ideas were welcomed by the other writers, while others were shot
down. Looking back, I can see that some of my ideas were indeed bad, so
I was glad to work with another person who could see which of my ideas
would work and which would not. So sometimes scripts can use more than
one writer. With directors, that is a somewhat different story. For
some newbie directors, having someone else share the director's chair
can certainly help. It's somewhat different when it comes to more
seasoned directors. The most famous example is probably the team of Jim
Abrahams, Jerry Zucker, and David Zucker, who together in the 1980s
directed the cult comedies Airplane!, Top Secret!, and
Ruthless
People.
But after those three movies, they never directed a movie all together
again. I once read an interview with one of those three directors where
he explained their splitting up (at least when it came to directing) by
saying that it was getting uncomfortable sharing the same director's
chair.
I can kind of understand what he said. I can see that
directing a movie with one other person would inevitably mean the
clashing of ideas. I can only imagine what it would be like with three
people in total. From what I have seen over the years, when a movie has
been made with more than one director for whatever reason, it has a
higher than average chance of not working. A movie needs to be made
with one clear vision, and extra eyes can shake things up in a bad way.
So when I heard about the movie The Dungeonmaster,
it seemed to be a recipe for disaster. That's because the movie was
directed not by two or three directors, but seven
in total. And most of those seven directors also contributed to the
writing of
the screenplay. Though I concluded from all this that the end results
had to be a mess, it promised to be a mess that at least was memorable.
The chief protagonist of The Dungeonmaster
is a young man by the name of Paul (Byron, Metalstorm: The
Destruction Of Jared-Syn). He has a girlfriend named Gwen (Wing,
High
School Musical)
that he loves, though Gwen feels their relationship is a little
strained because of Paul's constant work on his pet project, a personal
computer that he relies on for many things. But it turns out Paul is
lucky to have his computer, because one day out of the blue he and Gwen
are captured by a sorcerer from another dimension by the name of
Mestema (Moll, No Dessert Dad, Til You
Mow The Lawn).
We learn that over the centuries Mestema has challenged and defeated a
number of magical opponents, and is seeking a new and worthy opponent
with new skills - and Paul with his computer seems to be just that
person. Holding Gwen hostage, Mestema subsequently subjects Paul to a
string of unique challenges he must overcome if he wants himself and
Gwen to be freed. And Paul only has his computer and his wits to help
him conquer each challenge.
There are seven challenges in all that the character of
Paul has to go through, with each segment helmed by a different
director. Since The Dungeonmaster
is more or less seven vignettes loosely connected together by the
wraparound story, I felt that the best way to critique the movie would
be to write an in depth analysis of each segment instead of writing
about the general quality of things like special effects and acting.
The first challenge Paul has to face ("Ice Gallery") was written and
directed by Rosemarie Turko. The challenge has Paul finding himself in
an ice cave filled with Mestema's frozen past opponents - who of course
come to life and threaten to kill Paul and Gwen. This sequence is
pretty short, and it's just as well, because it is extremely flat. The
obviously soundstage set ice cavern set is small and covered with
Styrofoam. The frozen opponents, from Jack The Ripper to a samurai
warrior, hardly get a chance to make an impression. Probably the worst
thing about the entire segment is the writing. Paul and Gwen take being
suddenly transported to this strange and threatening environment a mere
minute or so after being kidnapped surprisingly well. And it's never
explained how Paul not only suddenly figures out how his computer
(which Mestema has provided to him via changing it to an attachment on
his arm) can help him defend himself against one opponent, he also
suddenly knows that an ice crystal in the cavern has the power to
defeat all his opponents. In short, the only cool aspect of this
segment is the low temperature in the cavern.
The next segment ("Demons Of The Dead") was written and
directed by special effects guru John Carl Buechler, and involves Paul
being transported to an underworld full of zombie warriors controlled
by a small monster named Ratspit. This segment is an improvement over
the first... slightly. The cavern set looks both bigger and more
impressive, and the zombie makeup is okay. However, Buechler's puppet
Ratspit creation is somewhat of a disappointment. It not only looks
very small (about the size of a cat), the facial expressions of this
puppet are extremely limited. But that didn't bother me as much as the
scripting of this segment. Once again, the character of Paul almost
instantly knows what to do with every challenge in this environment,
not even breaking a sweat. When the protagonist in a movie isn't seen
struggling with a challenge, it's hard to get on his side; he becomes a
know-it-all instead, and you get annoyed with him. Indeed, by the point
the character of Paul was starting to turn me off.
We then go to the third challenge ("Heavy Metal"),
written and directed by Empire studio head Charles Band. This challenge
proves to be the most frightening so far - Paul must face the heavy
metal band W.A.S.P. at a night club! Band tries to scare the audience
in part by having the band perform one of their strident and easily
interchangeable songs, but apart from that touch, the entire segment
falls flat. When Paul walks toward the band to face them, he has the
great challenge of heavy metal fans in the night club pawing him. Ooh!
And once Paul reaches the stage, once again he has a challenge that
hardly gives him a problem at all. This time around, instead of Paul
suddenly coming up with a solution, the computer on his arm suddenly
tells him what needs to be done, and does it for him. And in seconds,
W.A.S.P. is defeated and the challenge is over. Though seeing W.A.S.P.
get vaporized certainly is pleasing, there isn't anything else of real
merit to say about this segment.
Moving on, we soon get to the fourth challenge ("Stone
Canyon Giant"), which was written and directed by special effects
master David Allen, best known for his stop-motion animation work. So
it comes as no surprise that this segment features some stop-motion
animation depicting the title menace Paul has to face. I will say this
about this segment - the stop motion giant stone figure is a fairly
impressive special effect accomplishment. The animation is smooth, and
the stone giant looks imposing. But the special effects are the only
good thing to say about this segment. The segment starts off with some
promise, with Paul's computer on his arm being stolen by some little
people. Ah, I thought, now Paul will have to use his brains to conquer
this particular challenge. But to my disappointment, Paul not only got
back his computer shortly before the stone giant came to life, he
simply used his computer to fire laser beams at the giant to defeat it.
I don't think it's necessary to say why all of that severely
underwhelmed me.
The fifth challenge ("Slasher"), while directed by actor
Steven Ford (Eraser),
happened to be written by the actor playing Paul, Jeffrey Byron. In
this segment, Paul finds himself back in modern Los Angeles, but
quickly finds out that a serial killer has set his sights on Gwen - and
the police think that Paul is the one behind all the killings. This
segment has a little atmosphere here and there, but it's not enough to
save things. Every challenge Paul has to face in this segment, from
being arrested by the police to facing the real serial killer, is once
again quickly overcome by his computer each and every time. And once
again, I don't think I have to say why that irked me.
Peter Manoogian (who later directed Eliminators
and Arena)
wrote and directed the sixth segment, "Cave Beast". Yes, this makes
three of the seven challenges that take place in a cave! So it should
come as no surprise that this lack of originality also extends to Paul
once again having to use his computer to get through the challenge and
not struggling that much at all. Trust me, other aspects of the segment
(like the cave beast itself) are not worth mentioning at all.
The seventh and last segment ("Desert Pursuit") was
written and directed by Ted Nicolaou (Subspecies), and
involves Paul and Gwen getting into post apocalypse shenanigans a la The Road Warrior.
However, the Mel Gibson movie had a budget, while the penny pinching
Charles Band only apparently gave Nicolaou enough money to hire just
four bad guys and three decked-out vehicles. While it might have been
possible despite the limited funds to generate some excitement,
Nicolaou seems unable to raise the excitement level of the desert car
chases above the level of mere routine.
So as you can see, none of the seven showcase segments
in The
Dungeonmaster
are worthy of merit, at least as a whole. For that matter, the
wraparound material (directed by Charles Band) isn't any better. I
could go on for a while detailing the many problems with this
wraparound footage, from the obvious padding to the extremely
disappointing (and underwhelming) way the inevitable climactic
one-on-one duel between Paul and Mestema is handled. But the biggest
disappointment with this linking material has to do with the character
of Mestema himself. While there are hints he is more than just a
sorcerer, we don't get more than hints about this character. When he
first shows up, it's all of a sudden and sorely lacking explanation,
and his subsequent appearances flesh him out very little. Worse, he
doesn't seem to be all that evil, more just a guy who likes to get into
mischief. This may explain why actor Richard Moll doesn't seem sure as
to how to play this guy. Moll shouts and gets angry, but it all seems
very half-hearted. So adding the flat linking material into the pot, The Dungeonmaster
ends up being pretty much a complete waste of time. That is, unless you
have an interest in seeing so much talent misused and wasted.
(Posted January 19, 2021)
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See also: Black Sabbath, Freakshow, The Last Run
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